To all my friends running the Boston Marathon on Monday,
Sorry that you have to race in Bean Town, on a Monday no less, when you could be running in the Glass City on a Sunday. Everybody knows marathons are run on Sunday and that beans and marathons just don't mix.
Sorry that you had to run a qualifying time and then hope you were also fast enough on the keyboard in order to spend a fair chunk of change to get an invitation to run on a Monday in April, when you could have simply paid $50 for the privilege of seeing the sights of Toledo.
Sorry that you have to navigate your way through hoards of people, traffic jams, and who knows what kind of weather (is it ever sunny on the east coast?) when the tropical breezes from south of the (Michigan) border are sure to carry us along as we run past the home of the world famous Mud Hens.
Sorry that the throngs of runners and fans alike will probably be so noisy and generate so much energy you won't be able to hear that 3 hour music montage you spent so much time formulating. The Glass City marathon is run on bike paths through parks where we will be sure to appreciate the play list.
And finally, sorry that you are stuck running a race with a section called "Heartbreak Hill", when you could be running "one of the fastest courses in the Midwest!"
I do feel bad for you. Perhaps next year I'll join you in your misery.
Until then, Run well, and Press On friends.
A fellow marathoner, heading South to run a Sunday marathon in April